If I’m being honest, I’ve always thrived in chaos.

When things started to feel too steady, too predictable, too “this is it” — something inside me would start to itch.

It wasn’t loud at first.

Just a quiet unease, a subtle disconnection, a feeling I couldn’t fully explain but couldn’t ignore either.

And instead of sitting with it… I would blow things up.

A marriage that looked like a fairytale.
A career that checked every box.
A condo I was proud to own.
A life that, by all accounts, should have felt like enough.

But every time I got there — every time I started to settle into it — something inside me would say:

This isn’t it.

And instead of asking why, instead of getting curious, I would make a hard right turn.

Burn it down. Start again. Repeat.

For a long time, I thought that meant something was wrong with me.

Now I see it differently.

In 2025, I talked to a medium who said something that landed in a way that finally made sense:

“You thrive in chaos. You like to have multiple things going on at once.”

And for the first time, instead of trying to fix that part of me — I understood it.

The problem wasn’t that I needed less chaos.

The problem was that I had never learned how to hold both:

Movement and stability.
Freedom and grounding.
Expansion and safety.

I thought it had to be one or the other.

But what if it didn’t?

What if I could build a life where I had a steady income and multiple creative outlets?

Where I could have a home base and still explore?

Where I didn’t have to destroy something good just to feel alive again?

That realization changed everything.

Not overnight, not perfectly, but fundamentally.

My numerology life path is a three. If you’re into that kind of thing, it means my life will always circle back to:

Expression.
Creativity.
Storytelling.
Communication.
Turning emotion into something tangible.

Three has followed me long before I ever knew what numerology was — growing up as an only child, it was always the three of us: me, my mom, my dad. Now I catch myself using three exclamation points when I’m excited, three emojis when something really hits and I’ve even tattooed 333 on my hand because I see it everywhere — my little wink from the universe.

If you’re not into that kind of thing, here’s the simpler version:

I process life by creating from it.

Everything I go through — the heartbreak, the confusion, the joy, the in-between moments — eventually becomes something.

Words.
Movement.
Ideas.
Connection.

That’s what ties all my “different lives” together.